Coping With Complex, Stress-Related Emotions Amid Cancer
- A stressful event, such as being diagnosed with cancer, like Isabella Strahan was, can cause a huge array of emotions among patients and loved ones, and these feelings can certainly vary a great deal from person to person. In Michael Strahan’s case, he admitted in a recent interview that staying positive throughout the “tough” times helped him cope with his emotions. He also advised it’s ok to be vulnerable.
- Strahan’s 20-year-old daughter Isabella is now in remission after undergoing surgery, radiation therapy, and grueling chemotherapy for cancer treatment for a type of brain cancer called medulloblastoma.
- Medulloblastoma is a rare primary central nervous system tumor. This type of brain tumor is cancerous and proliferates, making it more likely to spread to other parts of the body. Immediate treatment was needed, including surgery to remove most of the tumor, followed by radiation and chemotherapy to get whatever was left behind.
- When going through something difficult, it’s important to realize and accept that emotions come and go. There will be good days and bad days.
Psychiatrist Dr. Lori Plutchik stresses that it is also important for your support team including both doctors and loves ones to understand the fluidity of stress-related emotions. - It’s really important to keep tabs on your mental health and, if necessary, seek treatment. This doesn’t necessarily mean traditional therapy because while it may be really helpful (even life-changing) for some, that doesn’t mean it’s for everyone.
Isabella Strahan, recently battled a type of brain cancer called medulloblastoma, which the National Cancer Institute explains as a rare primary central nervous system tumor, and celebrated going into remission after eight months of treatment.
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Strahan wasn’t shy to admit how “tough and painful” it was to watch his daughter struggle.
He explained to Town & Country, “It was like, ‘How soon is it going to come back?’ It was painful for her to get out of bed and move and do those things that are completely necessary for her to do.
“As a parent, to see that was unsettling at times. But throughout this entire journey, Isabella has inspired and helped us all by how she has approached what she was facing.”
“She has worked so hard, and with such amazing spirit. And she is still on a journey with her vision, balance, and getting her weight back,” Strahan added.
Speaking on her courageous cancer battle, Isabella told the news outlet, “I feel like I’ve grown in many ways. I’m super-grateful for walking and talking again.
“You don’t think of the things you can do until you live without them.”
She continued, “I’m happy to be here. I think this year has made me stronger. The people in your life are what makes it enjoyable. Now I don’t say no to anything. I don’t think, I’ll do it next week.
“You don’t know what next week will look like.”
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Isabella also addressed the issue of “most people” not understanding the challenges of families who have a loved one battling disease.
“It’s also important to give back to the staff who helped me, because they saved my life. All the doctors and nurses were amazing,” she said.
Her dad followed up with, “We’re not the first family to go through this and unfortunately won’t be the last, but if we can help at all, hopefully at some point there will be a last.
“I want to do as much as I can to help all these families who are not as fortunate as we are in certain ways to get through this. …. Don’t think about the future. Appreciate everyone around you. Tell them you love them.”
Strahan then stressed the importance of having a “positive attitude” while being a caregiver or helping a child with cancer, and “not being afraid to be emotional and vulnerable.”
Expert Resources On Coping With Emotions
- Mental Health and Cancer — The Fight, Flight or Freeze Response
- Mental Health: Coping With Feelings of Anger
- ‘Be Patient With Your Emotions’: A Social Worker’s Insights Into Handling a Cancer Diagnosis
- Fear, Anger, Anxiety: You’re Entitled To Your Emotions
- SN & You Presents Mental Health: Coping With Emotions
- Responding to Stress: How to Cope With Complex & Changing Emotions
- Changing the Culture: Medical Professionals Shouldn’t be Ashamed to Seek Mental Health Treatment
- Mental Health: A Guided Breathing Exercise to Help Manage Anxiety
Isabella Strahan’s Cancer Journey
Isabella announced she was “cancer-free” in an uplifting vlog post this summer saying, “It was a great scan; everything is clear, cancer-free.”
Her announcement was made eight months after she revealed that she had been diagnosed with a malignant brain tumor after suffering from intense headaches and nausea and had trouble walking.
She then told her followers she had medulloblastoma, rare primary central nervous system tumor, as per the National Cancer Institute. This type of brain tumor is cancerous and grows quickly, making it more likely to spread to other parts of the body.
Isabella, who has had an immense amount of support through her cancer journey from her friends, fans, and loved ones, first underwent emergency surgery to remove most of the mass in her brain earlier this year. Additional treatment included radiation therapy, followed by chemotherapy, to try and get any remaining cancer cells left behind.
It’s important to note that common symptoms for this type of tumor may include:
- Difficulty walking or balancing
- Headaches
- Nausea
- Vomiting
- Difficulty with vision
- Seizures
Isabella’s brain cancer journey began last Fall when she started experiencing headaches, nausea, and difficulty walking. When she would wake up, there were times when she would throw up blood.
Since chemotherapy has concluded, Isabella has admitted she’s looking forward to growing her hair back, something she spoke about in another YouTube video she shared in April.
Coping With Complex Emotions
When a stressful life event occurs, people may react with a range of different (and quickly changing) emotions. This is completely normal.
“The way people respond is very variable,” Psychiatrist Dr. Lori Plutchik tells SurvivorNet. “Very much consistent with how they respond to stresses and challenges in their life in general.”
Dr. Plutchik previously told SurvivorNet about how people react after a cancer diagnosis which can be a huge range of emotions from fear to anger to determination. However, the conclusion remains the same no matter what stressor someone may be dealing with: your emotions are valid and seeking mental health help may look different for every person.
Responding to Stress: How to Cope With Complex & Changing Emotions
“People have a range of emotions when they’re diagnosed with cancer,” Dr. Plutchik explains. “And they can include fear, anger … and these emotions tend to be fluid. They can recede and return based on where someone is in the process. Going through a cancer diagnosis is just the beginning of a complicated, complicated process.”
Dr. Plutchik explains that the patient, or person going through the stressful event, should accept that emotions will be fluid. You may feel fine one day and then feel a massive wave of stress the next. It’s also important for those you look to for support whether that’s a therapist, friends and family, or both to understand the fluidity of stress-related emotions.
If a stressful event is affecting how you think and feel, it may be time to seek some sort of mental health treatment. This could mean traditional talk therapy, medication, changing lifestyle habits (like exercise and diet), seeking out a support group, or many other approaches.
In order to keep your mental health in check, it’s important to be aware of signs which can be subtle that there is something affecting your mind. These signs include:
- A change in eating or sleeping habits
- Losing interest in people or usual activities
- Experiencing little or no energy
- Numb and/or hopeless feelings
- Turning to drinking or drugs more than usual
- Non-typical angry, upset, or on-edge feelings
- Yelling/fighting with loved ones
- Experiencing mood swings
- Intrusive thoughts
- Trouble getting through daily tasks
These symptoms can be wide-ranging and vary a great deal from person to person. Everyone experiences grief differently, for example. However, if you are feeling unusually sad, on-edge, or like you’re no longer interested in activities you used to love, know that there are many treatment options available and many different healthy ways to help you cope.
Caring for a Child with Cancer
Navigating a child’s cancer diagnosis can be incredibly tricky something Jayne Wexler knows all too well. She had to fill the roles of parent and cancer caregiver when her son, Justice, was diagnosed with acute lymphoblastic leukemia. Thankfully, he has since recovered.
In a previous interview with SurvivorNet, Wexler explained how she managed to be a mother and a caregiver all at once.
“I Try To Stay Strong, But Sometimes You Need To Cry”: Playing The Role of Cancer Caregiver and Mom
“Being a caregiver is a huge job,” Wexler said. “Fortunately, my husband and family were very supportive … it’s really hard to see your child go through this. If it could be me, I would take it in a second. You just go on auto-pilot and you just do what you have to do.”
Wexler also admitted that as a parent caring for a child with the disease, you don’t have a lot of time to sit down and deal with your own emotions.
“You don’t have that much time for yourself,” Wexler said. “I try to stay strong, but then sometimes you just want to go and cry, and you need to cry… it’s good to cry.”
The survival rate for children with cancer has improved over the past few decades, but pediatric cancer is still an incredibly hard thing for a family to go through. In her own caregiving experience, Wexler found therapy to be a great way to process everything happening to her family.
Regardless of whether it’s therapy or participating in your favorite activities or something entirely different, it’s important to find ways to also take care of yourself as you’re taking care of your child.
Advocating for Your Child
Here at SurvivorNet, we always encourage people to advocate for themselves when it comes to cancer and, more generally, health care. When it comes to a child, the parent must become the advocate just as we saw in the case above.
And even if you’re called ‘pushy’ or people dismiss the concerns you have for your child, it’s important to remember that you never know when speaking up about a seemingly unproblematic issue can lead to a very important diagnosis cancer or otherwise.
“Every appointment you leave as a patient, there should be a plan for what the doc is going to do for you, and if that doesn’t work, what the next plan is,” Dr. Zuri Murell, director of the Cedars-Sinai Colorectal Cancer Center, told SurvivorNet in a previous interview. “And I think that that’s totally fair. And me as a health professional that’s what I do for all of my patients.”
Be Pushy, Be Your Own Advocate, Don’t Settle
In a previous interview with SurvivorNet, April Knowles also talked about self advocacy and explained how she became a breast cancer advocate after her doctor dismissed the lump in her breast as a side effect of her menstrual period.
Unfortunately, that dismissal was a mistake. Knowles was diagnosed with metastatic breast cancer at age 39. She said the experience taught her the importance of listening to her body and speaking up when something doesn’t feel right.
I Wanted My Doctor To Like Me, Then He Missed My Breast Cancer
“I wanted my doctor to like me,” she said. “I think women, especially young women, are really used to being dismissed by their doctors.”
Figuring out whether or not you have or your child has cancer based on possible symptoms is critical because early detection may help with treatment and outcomes.
Seeking multiple opinions is one way make sure you are or your child is getting the proper care and attention. You should also try to remember that not all doctors are in agreement. Recommendations for further testing or treatment options can vary, and sometimes it’s essential to talk with multiple medical professionals.
Contributing: SurvivorNet Staff
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