‘A Relationship Disease’ — SurvivorNetTV Presents: The Power of Emotional Support For Men Handling Prostate Cancer

“Cancer is something that affects not just the person who’s diagnosed, but the family, whether that’s your partner, whether that’s your kids, whether the community,” Dr. Kysa Christie, a clinical oncology psychologist at the West Los Angeles VA, tells SurvivorNet.

“It’s tough on your relationship with whoever that person is because they clearly care for you if you’re relying on them to be part of your support structure. And that building of that team of support becomes critical to anybody that’s going through cancer,” Crosby said.

During the early stages of your diagnosis, your team of supporters can be most helpful. Your supporters can be made up of close family members and friends. Your support group can also be filled with people outside your inner circle.

One of the benefits of having supporters includes helping alleviate stress and anxiety following your diagnosis. Supporters can also help advocate for you during treatment.

How to Maintain Intimacy as a Prostate Cancer Patient

After a prostate cancer diagnosis, your sex life may be impacted significantly if your treatment comes with side effects like erectile dysfunction or reduces your desire to have sex.

“After prostate cancer, one of the biggest things that people talk about is how it’s changed their sex life, both their interest in sex, but also being able to have sex like you used to. This can be a huge stressor for a person’s relationships. And so, how do you start talking about it with your partner, or perhaps you’re dating? When do I bring it up?” Dr. Christie said.

RELATED: Sex Is Possible After Prostate Cancer and 5 Other Facts You Should Know

“Are you willing to have sex in a different way that you might have to use a pill, use a device? Yes, that’s a change. Does that make you feel like less of a man? For some people, it does, and that can be that initial wall that you hit. Part of it is figuring out how many times you’re going to run into that wall until you’re willing to try a different strategy,” Dr. Christie added.

RELATED:  VA Care Insights: Sexual Function Recovery After Prostate Cancer Surgery

Coping With Fear After a Diagnosis

Once you’ve been diagnosed with cancer, you’re likely to be consumed with a wide range of emotions. Among the list of emotions you may feel is fear.

“There’s fear, there’s anger, there’s depression, there’s wonderment about why you ask a lot of times why it happened to me, but fear does enter into it,” Crosby said.

“Something that comes up a lot for people is a fear of being a burden. Not wanting to burden people, not wanting to interrupt anyone else’s life,” Dr. Christie said.

However, the fear Crosby speaks of can hinder additional support for the patient because they may be less likely to explain what’s going on fully.

“What ends up often happening and is exactly the opposite of what people are wanting is the more people hold in and not share, that’s what becomes a burden, because your family, your friends, they can tell that something is going on, something has changed. And by not knowing what it is, it creates distance. And people end up sort of tiptoeing around each other. They want to be able to check in, they want to be able to help, but they don’t know what’s allowed,” Dr. Christie explained.

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